The Tree Hunt

A couple weekends ago I became acutely aware of how sweet motherhood 
is. It's easy to get caught up in the go, go, go (and not as is Diego) and the 
do, do, do of it all, easy to lose sight of what's important, of what really counts. 
Sure the tantrums are tough and the defiance from the five year old brings to 
mind a scene of a classic stand off between a parent and their teen. But we're 
in the business of bringing amazing individuals from baby to child to adult. I'm 
convinced it's the most difficult and rewarding job there is. 

That weekend we drove an hour with our little crew and cut down our
own Christmas tree at a tree farm. Unseasonably warm, it was a great
day to be out with the kids. Our tiniest family member to needed to be 
nursed as soon as we arrived, and of course a massive poopie blowout
followed. With my car seat as a makeshift changing table, I struggled to
keep my six month old from squirming off the seat, desperately tried
to avoid smearing poop somewhere it shouldn't be, and braced myself
against the car door, which the wind attempted to force close. Once the 
wind got the better of me, and the door frame clunked against my temple.

Where was my dear husband and darling children? They were off exploring 
the tree farm and deciding what kind of tree they wanted. My husband's
expression was both questioning and relieved when he saw me trudge 
up the hill toward them. I explained the poopie episode, wind fight, and 
the bump on my head (I forgot to mention the struggle with the baby sling
I had just bought, couldn't get it nearly as tight as it was supposed to be.
It had seemed so easy in the store!). I received a sympathetic look and 
we proceeded with our small band of (what was it that day?), oh yes,
Christmas tree hunters (it could've been pirates, tigers, cowboys, or
bunny rabbits), that day we were all simply Christmas tree hunters, on
a mission to find the perfect tree. 

The children hopped, jumped, ran, and danced their way between the 
trees. A few were too short, a few too misshapen, a couple too tall. It 
had to be just right. Clearly the farm had been picked over a bit, and 
the drought from the summer was evident in branches colored a lighter
green to light brown. We wove our way through the small, symmetrical
forest until we stumbled upon a good contender, nicely shaped and a 
perfect height. Although not as green as I'd like, it was our tree. The 
children shouted their approval, out came the borrowed saw, and down
came our tree. There were a few shoves to claim who would pull the 
small plastic sled carrying the tree first, but after a stern scolding, a 
reminder to share, and apologetic hugs and kisses, we were off again.
Back by a small barn-like structure to pay for our prize, the children
attempted to befriend everyone who happened by and introduced them
to our tree. 

On our way home, I reflected over our little excursion and watched 
the children slowly become calm and glassy-eyed as nap time 
approached. Although a touch stressful at times, how sweet this time
had been. Letting our kids be kids, enjoying each of their personalities, 
loving every bit of who they are, and appreciating that God gave them
to us is what I took from that afternoon. 

Life happens so quickly. Let's enjoy every moment with our families,
always love and forgive each other, and always cherish what God has
given us.

The Best Laid Plans

The last couple of weeks have been interesting. I've neglected my computer
in attempts to declutter my home and begin preparing for baby number three
to arrive. It might be a bit early yet, but better now than scrambling the week 
before he's due. It's been a challenge considering now I'm a bit anemic 
(taking iron now) and am feeling it. I've been doing a bit everyday, rendering
me completely exhausted by the late afternoon. 


In addition to my new found compulsion to get the house in order, I've also 
been extremely pensive, analyzing my heart and perspectives on life. I like
to plan. I consider multiple possibilities about a certain something, dissect the
pros and cons, decide on the best course of action (according to my brain), 
and make plans accordingly. Good luck changing my mind after I've been 
through this process. However, I've learned a difficult lesson this last month
which has caused me to reassess how I go about making decisions. 


My kids have been attending a wonderful private preschool attached to a 
local church, which also has an excellent elementary and middle school. 
My mom-in-law teaches at another nearby private school which enrolls 
2 year olds through middle school. It's much smaller, newer (only been 
in existence for five years), and Jason (my other half) wanted me to check
it out. Why would I? I thought. The kids' current school is well established,
(my mother went there as a child) nationally recognized blue ribbon, of course
accredited, and had plenty of extracurricular sports. Their school was everything
I wanted. My daughter has sweet little friends there. I saw no need to change.


My husband wouldn't let it go, no matter how many times I expressed my 
opinion. I reluctantly agreed for my daughter to go visit the 4/5 year old 
class at my mom-in-law's school. On the fateful day I showed up about mid 
morning to observe my daughter during the visit. They were cleaning up 
before going outside for recess and then to art class. I had an hour with 
the class teacher and discussed her methods of teaching, curriculum, 
approaches to discipline, and her thoughts on my daughter. She completely
blew me away. I loved everything she said and appreciated her spot on 
assessment of my daughter. We finished with a tour of the facilities, which 
were excellent, especially considering the young age of the school. 


I knew right away, deep down, that this was the perfect setting for my daughter. 
That "knowing" was God. He was gently showing me His plan for my
children. I was teary eyed upon the realization. I had been so sure of the 
right direction for my children. Of course I had prayed that the Lord show me
what to do, but I was positive He agreed with me. I was so sure that I had
already registered my daughter for next year at her current school. With the
registration fee nonrefundable I knew instantly I was out a few hundred 
dollars. It caused a nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomach. What's worse,
after finally having a release from Jason to register her for next year at her
current school a couple weeks earlier, on the way to do so, I had a funny 
feeling that maybe I shouldn't, what we Christians call a "check" in our
spirit. A small voice whispering direction. I had dismissed the feeling. I knew
better! Lesson learned the hard way.


Both my children are now enrolled for next year at the new school. Although
it saddens me to not be returning to their current school next year, I'm 
at peace knowing we're following God. Our plans may seem perfectly 
logical and correct, but God always knows better. I trust my family's future
in His hands much better than in my own. God sees everything, past, present,
future. He knows everything and has our best interests at heart. 


As aftermath from this learning experience, I have naturally questioned other
areas of my life, hence the incredibly pensive last couple weeks. Am I truly
seeking God in all I do? Or am I planning my life and casually running my
plans by the Lord for His check mark of approval without really asking what
His plans are? I have begun to ask the Lord for wisdom in all that I do. I want
His best for me and my family.


"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and
not for evil, to give your a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11, English Standard
Version.

"I Don't Want To"

My two year old's new favorite phrase is, "No, I don't want to." He blurts it
out almost constantly, but especially at mealtimes, nap times, or when I try
to hold his hand crossing parking lots. The latter requires me to pick him 
up while he's kicking, flailing, and screaming until we arrive to safety. I'm
now immune to this embarrassing scene. 


How often do I feel like saying, "I don't want to," or even more appropriately,
"I don't feel like it?" Lately, all I want to do is curl up on the couch and nap. 
True, I have two small children and another one on the way, but stuff still
needs to get done. I still need to keep up with the house, prayer time, and 
my writing. Even as an adult, there are times I wish I could behave like my
son and get away with it. 


Even if just inwardly, we can throw our own little tantrums when something 
doesn't go our way. I'm thankful our Heavenly Father is not only immune 
to them, but covers us with His mercy and grace. This doesn't give us a 
license to behave badly, inwardly or outwardly. However there have been 
times in my life when I, spiritually speaking, was kicking and screaming, 
and God brought me to safety anyway. I'm thankful He's so good to us, 
especially when we don't deserve it. 






  

Strength in Weakness

Silence. A rarity in our home. I'm soaking it in, for it visits briefly. For a 
moment I can hear things I normally wouldn't, the hum of my computer,
a bird singing in the distance (no doubt confused by this wacky Midwest 
weather), the roar of a jet engine thousands of feet above me, the rhythmic
breathing of my dreaming dog, and my own thoughts whirling what seems
at top notch speeds between my uneven ears. 


Taking the time to sit and think is something I don't do often enough. Today
I feel especially pensive. Am I bulldozing through life unaware of my 
surroundings and of my fellow life travelers? Am I being sensitive to those
very closest to me, tender-hearted towards my children and loving husband?
Am I the picture of the mother I envision for my children, the wife my honey
needs? 


We all traverse through times of feeling inadequate or less than ideal. The 
reality is we are inadequate. Harsh? Reality often is. The good news is it's
okay. It's okay to feel like we're not enough or good enough, but with that
self awareness understand we are more than enough when we allow 
Christ to live in and shine through us. By myself I may feel overwhelmed
and like a complete failure as a mother/homemaker, but when I surrender
my will and my plans to the Lord, Jesus Christ, trusting that He knows my
needs even better than I do, suddenly burdens fall from my weary shoulders. 
I find myself peaceful and content. 

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.  2 Corinthians 12:9 -10

So what do I take away from this? Know that being human means we will and 
do make mistakes. We struggle. We fail at times. Cut yourself some slack, ask
for forgiveness if needed, give those things to the Lord, and move on towards our
focus, Jesus Christ. True that we are to be immitators of Christ, striving to be
more like Him by walking in love with those around us, but I think too often
we try to do that on our own. What is love again? Love is patient and kind; does 
not envy or boast, doesn't insist on it's own way; it's not irritable or resentful; it
rejoices with the truth, not wrongdoing; it bears all things, hopes all things, 
believes all things, endures all thins. Love never ends. I Corinthians 13:4-8

Looking at that list of what love actually is makes me feel completely lacking,
but then I remember, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
Phillipians 4:13  Today, if you feel inadequate, know that we all really are and
trust our Heavenly Father with your weaknesses. This is how we become the
women, wives, and mothers we've been called to be, with His strength, not
ours. 

Finding Excuses for your Resolutions?

After about a one month hiatus from the Internet in general, it's time to get 

back in the swing of things, and what better day than the twelfth day of 2012?

I believe it's the coldest day of the year outside, and although we've only had

a couple inches of snow, it was mad chaos on the roads this morning. It took

Jason 2 & 1/2 hours to get to work this morning. I find myself one of many 

people wondering how such a little snow caused so much trouble for a town

supposedly used to handling winter weather. It's not like Tulsa (a.k.a. T town

where I went to college) where the whole place shuts down for a half inch of 

snow. Although, I think last year most likely cured Tulsanians of any ignorance

of what to do when it snows. I believe they had several feet of snow over the

winter last year. 

What happened in my hometown today must be a result of too many people 

thinking, It's just a dusting. No big deal. Even those responsible for preparing

the streets with salt, I think did so a bit late. So, everyone and their mom went

out this morning, the small amount of snow we had was pack down causing 

all kinds of accidents, and the temperature is crazy cold so that spots are 

refreezing causing, you guessed it, black ice. Enough venting and back to 

things that you all actually care about. 

What did I write about last time? Ah yes, discipline. Ouch! How are the 

resolutions coming along? If you're like me, you're struggling to keep up

with self-inflicted expectations. I have been working hard on getting my

house in some type of order, but I find that after a morning of de-cluttering,

I'm completely spent and have a hard time maintaining productivity. 

Excuses? I have one... in the form of a tiny human being growing by leaps

and bounds inside of me. The nesting instinct has kicked in high gear (even

though I have quite a ways to go), which is the main source of my cleaning

fits. 

Oh, and did I mention Jason had his appendix out emergently last week? 

That was exciting and included an entire night in the ER with surgery at 5 a.m. 

I feel like I'm still catching up from that night devoid of sleep. You'll be happy 

to know that despite the typical case of "man-itis" (wives you know what I'm

talking about), he's recovering quite nicely. Why is it that men act all stoic 

and low maintenance in the hospital, a literal dream for their nurses, but

are the opposite at home? Giving him credit, Jason's case of man-itis wasn't 

severe, but enough for this pregnant mamma. 

Back to the main point of this post. Have I stepped up my Bible reading 

(one of my main goals for 2012)? Well, somewhat, but not as much as I 

should. Mornings are too hectic, afternoons I find myself dozing on the couch, 

and by the time evening comes, I'm completely exhausted. So what's the 

solution? I say to myself, "Stop making excuses and do it!" More importantly, 

I'm praying for the Lord to help me with self-discipline. Thank the Lord He's 

faithful always and especially when we're not. You know what I love about 

the Lord? Even when we get caught up with ourselves, He doesn't condemn 

us. He simply loves, forgives, and patiently waits for us to adjust our focus to 

where it's supposed to be... on Him. 

I pray your focus, as well as mine, will stay exactly where it should, and that 

we don't get too caught up with ourselves or our households to spend precious 

time with our Father and Creator in Heaven. 

Resolute in Resolutions?

The new year will be upon us shortly. 2012... can you believe it? New years
come with the hope of new beginnings. Already this week, I've noticed what 
seems like more runners out hitting the pavement in what I'd imagine is a 
head start on their resolutions. One somewhat older gentleman I observed 
looked like he should've had a paramedic following him down the road... just
in case. 


The end of one year and the start of another causes me to ponder what I'd 
like to change in my life. If I could narrow it down, I want to be more disciplined 
when it comes to my quiet time with the Lord, be sure to actually open my Bible 
daily and in my housework. It's been difficult having two kids four and under 
and being pregnant to keep up with the house and laundry. It's much easier to 
sit and type than to hall around the vacuum or heaping baskets of clothes that 
never end. And as far as my Bible reading and prayer time, well I don't have 
any excuses for that. 


I'd also love to acquire a literary agent this next year. I'm trusting the Lord will
continue to guide me in this search, and all will come to pass in His good 
timing. In the mean time, I continue to refine what I've written and have started
on a new project. 


I love the idea of new beginnings. Intentions are great, but I can't help but
think about follow through, that discipline deal. How can I be sure to not
let the new changes slip away as the months go by? 

1. Take a lesson from Nike and "Just do it!" Stop making excuses.
2. Ask the Lord for help when I just don't feel like it. We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us (Philippians 4:13). 
3. Remember that when I work, whether at my job or doing laundry at home, I do it for the Lord. Colossians 3:23, "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men."

I take these points to heart as the new year approaches. Do you plan to make

any New Year's resolutions? Do you have a plan or strategy on how to keep them?

Tis the Season...

Christmas is my favorite time of year. I know, it sound cliche, but true
nonetheless. I love Christmas music, trimming the tree, and the wonder
on my children's faces as they rediscover all the ornaments on the 
tree. Of course, I have to stay vigilant with my two year old. He seems
to think the ornaments are there for him to remove. This is also the 
time of year I tend to make Toll House cookies, our family's favorite.


More than ever, this year, my heart has been impressed with the 
truth that it is more blessed to give than receive. The last couple
years have been particularly difficult for many people I know, and
I'm sure that you know as well. Personally, we are "tighter" financially
this year than I can ever remember. It's natural to want to take 
care of your own family first. Although we do have a responsibility
as parents to make sure our children's needs are met, we don't 
need as much as society tells us. Do we need to have an HD TV? 
Despite the male perspective that it is a bare necessity, it really isn't. 
Our children don't have to have the latest and coolest toy if it doesn't 
fit into the budget. 


I've been trying to instill an attitude of thankfulness in my children 
this year. They may not get everything they want, but we need to
be mindful of those less fortunate and thankful for what we do have.
Above all, the Lord is our Provider. He knows what we need before
we even ask and delights in us as His children. Matthew 7:9-11
speaks to this and says that if we who are human and sin give
good gifts to our children, how much more will our Father in 
Heaven?


When I was in college, I traveled to West Africa with my school on
a medical mission trip. We were there for 2 months. I'll never forget
the hospitality of the sweet people there, and how they gave to us
the more fortunate, even though they seemed to have nothing. God 
desires us to have a giving heart. The people I met in West Africa 
exemplified that perfectly. How much more can we give? Not only
material possessions to those less fortunate, but give of our time,
ourselves. Someone I know recently told me of a relative of hers
who has found herself and her child in an extremely unfortunate 
situation. I was able to give out of what I already have toward that 
situation. Let's be mindful of those around us this Christmas season.
Let's give of ourselves, our time, or our resources if possible. In 
doing so when shine the Light of Christ to those around us. 


I pray you and yours have a wonderful, fun filled Christmas season,
with sweet family gatherings, special memories, and giving hearts. 

God's Grace is Sufficient

With my kids temporarily entranced by Word World, I must literally hurry up 
and write my post for this week, which has been one of the most difficult
since I've been pregnant. My all-the-time sickness has been intense. 
Yesterday, I was sure I'd puke all over the grocery store floor. By the 
grace of God, that didn't happen. The rest of the day, I was couch-bound,
unable to move. As difficult as this week has been, I remember that 
my new little one is well worth it, and I'm relieved to be within a month
of my second trimester, when I'll hopefully feel much better. 


Why is it when I'm not feeling well my dear, sweet, adorable children 
sense my weakness and run through the house like they're competing
in the 100 yard dash? High-pitched screams drown out any other 
competing noises, children collide into each other, the house is 
a disaster zone, dishes are piled up in the sink, laundry is lurking
in the basement, revisions are impatiently waiting on my laptop,
my Bible is longing to be opened, and all I can think is "God help
me!" 


I remember, "My grace is sufficient for you," and that God will not give
me more than I can bear. God is good. I've been relying on Galatians 
5 and Psalm 23. In Galatians, we read about the Fruits of the Spirit, one
of which is peace. Peace is a Fruit of the Spirit. If I abide in the Lord, I 
have peace. In Psalm 23, we are told the "Lord is our Shepherd (to
feed, guide and shield), I shall not lack," in the Amplified. That 
encompasses all of our needs. No matter what we're going through, 
God is our Strength and our Hope. He is our Rock. He knows what we 
need before we ask. God meets us where we are, and He loves us
where we are. 


I know what I'm going through is temporary, and God will give me 
the strength to endure, to be a good mom, and to accomplish what
I need to do. I'd appreciate your prayers over the next few weeks as
I come to the end of my first trimester. I'm also determined to work 
on some revisions today during the munchkins' nap time. :)

Inspiration from an Uninspired Tuesday

What do you say when you feel like you have nothing to say?
You sit at your desk or on your couch and stare seemingly
mindlessly at a computer screen void of characters or thoughts 
and wonder what to do next. I'm sitting here, you think, at least 
trying whip up some sort of literary delight, something inspiring, 
something thought provoking. Yet nothing comes. 


This describes me perfectly this week. I've sat down many times
to write this post, but currently I feel completely unoriginal and 
uninspired. I'd much rather curl up with my Boxer-Schnauzer mix,
Hobbes, and dream the afternoon away. The soft sounds of strings 
and piano from my son's lullaby CD only encourage my sleepy state. 


Yet a writer must write, right? Despite how we feel or what we
may think, we must write, even if we think we have nothing to say. 
It comes down to self discipline. We all have God-given talents,
and we must exercise them. I don't know if practice really makes
perfect, but is sure helps. Because blogging forces we who are
aspiring authors to accountability with ourselves and others, 
I consider it essential to those of us attempting to break into the
literary world. It's Tuesday, I think to myself, it's been a week.
I have to write something... . 


Beyond the dullness fogging my mind I know there is more. Colorful 
creativity and playful prose are waiting for me to break through walls 
of mediocrity and melancholy, walls otherwise known at writer's block.
Will I succumb to these walls that attempt to intimidate? Not a bit. After 
all, a writer must write. 


Does anyone else ever struggle with brainstorming fun and interesting 
topics to blog or write about? How do you combat non-inspired times?

My Life: A Prayer List being Answered, Part 4

God has fulfilled so many of my dreams and prayers throughout my life. I am 

so blessed with all that He has given me. But as the childhood and young 

adulthood prayers come to pass, new ones emerge. Growing up, I never 

saw myself as a writer and never imagined I'd be venturing out into the 

unknown world of children's literature. 

In the spring of 2010, when I first felt a tug on my heart to write a children's 

book, I could also never have known just what having a children's book 

published would entail. I have learned so much in the last year, not only 

about writing, but about myself. When faced with the reality of the 

publication process, I had to ask myself, How much do I really want this?

What it came down to is this - if God gave me this desire to write for children, 

then there must be a reason, and I must see it through. 

My prayer for this new endeavor is that I following God's leading and 

direction beyond publication. He is the One who gave me this desire to write 

for children, and I want to be sure to honor Him in all that I do now and in the 

future. I pray for my characters to be relatable, funny, quirky, and adventurous, 

like most children I know. I pray that I keep God first, not only in this area of 

my life, but in all areas. God should be first and foremost, then family, and then 

work. I believe keeping these priorities straight will help me maintain some 

sort of balance as I strive to serve Christ, be a great wife and mother, work 

part time outside the home, keep up with the house, and write. 

Where am I in this process? I'm in the middle of some research involving

how best to revise your stories. I am reading Writing Picture Books by Ann

Whitford Paul, which has so far been packed full of great information on 

forming and revising picture book stories. For those of you who don't know,

a picture book is not a book with just pictures, but it is a classification

of a book that is for young children, roughly ages 2 - 8. I am about half

way through it, and given the opportunity, I should have it done by the 

end of the week. Much of what I am reading is affirming concepts I am 

already implementing in my work, but I do see some areas I can adjust

a bit. After I am finished reading, I'll scrutinize the three and a half stories

I have written in my children's book series to be sure they are the absolute

best they can be. I will then be pretty close to resubmitting to a literary agent

I'd love to work with. Until then, I'm trusting God to lead me and guide me

in all that I do. 

Do you have a prayer list, either written or in your heart? How has God

proven His faithfulness to you over the years?

My Life: A Prayer List being Answered, Part 3

I am so thankful that God directs the steps of those who love and serve Him.

There were several different paths I could have traversed as I came into 

adulthood, various carriers I could have chosen. What I would be when

I grew up changed many times as I grew older, but I was sure to always

include in my prayers for God's will to come to pass in my career choice.

When I was eight or nine, I remember wanting to be an archeologist more

than anything. Discovering artifacts from an ancient civilization seemed

so interesting and adventurous. A few years later, I watched Raiders of the 

Lost Ark, and while I loved the movie, I decided I loved life much more than

risking falling prey to a fatal booby trap. Besides, there are finite number of

objects that are waiting to be discovered, not very good job security, I 

rationalized to myself and moved on. 

I turned to dreams of becoming a marine biologist. Again this was fascinating

and adventurous and certainly would be a good choice. For a brief time, my

sisters shared my dream, and we were to be famous marine biologist sisters

working together to... . I'm not sure what. I can't remember why I decided 

against marine biology, but it could have been something to do with

shark week on the discovery channel. 

I briefly considered being a doctor or a teacher, but the thought of misdiagnosing

someone or grading papers the rest of my life squashed those ideas. I even

thought of being a nurse for a while, but when I realized I'd have to give shots, 

causing pain, I changed my mind. I wanted to help people, not hurt them.

And so, when it was time for me to go away to school, I did so with my major

"undecided." Throughout the school year, I spent hours praying for God's 

direction. "I'll do anything," I prayed, "just tell me what you want me to do."

I didn't feel any strong leading one way or another. Then one day one of the

girls in my dorm asked why I wasn't going into nursing. She pointed out that I 

was always taking care of the girls who were sick on my floor. The more

I thought about it, the more it made sense. "But I don't want to give shots,"

I protested. She countered if that was the only thing holding me back, I 

should talk to one of the other nursing majors on my floor. I took her advise

and was assured that giving shots wasn't a big deal (in that you get over it

quickly) and more importantly it was for the patient's own good. 

I spent about a week praying about pursuing nursing, and afterwards, I felt a 

strong sense of peace. That was it. I was going to be a nurse. This was in

the spring semester of my freshman year. I had wasted some time taking

classes I didn't need and had missed some classes vital to the nursing track.

Then another obstacle occurred. My parents were financially unable to send

me back to ORU (Oral Roberts University). I was devastated. I knew this was

where God wanted me to earn my degree. Why was this happening? 

The next year, I attended a local community college and took the necessary

courses to get on track with the nursing program at ORU. After months of 

prayer, I informed my parents that they didn't have to provide a penny, but

God was going to send me back to ORU. Full of faith, I finished my second

year strong and submitted my paperwork and transcripts to ORU. My 

Grandma Rose unexpectedly paid for that year in full. I was thrilled. 

I returned my third year with a new appreciation and determination 

in my schooling. I was able to secure a private loan for my fourth year,

and for my fifth year (thanks to that first year of being "undecided") I 

joined ROTC for a one year scholarship with a 4 year commitment to

the Air Force upon my graduation. Had I known about the ROTC program

earlier I would have been able to skip the unfortunate private loan. 

I graduated in "03 Summa Cum Laude, passed my nursing boards the next 

month, left for San Antonio the month after that for 6 weeks of Field Training

(boot camp), was commissioned as an officer in the U.S. Air Force by the 

end of the summer, and so started my nursing/military career. I served in 

the USAF for four years and learned a ton of valuable lessons, both

professional and personal. Upon completing my obligation, I returned to

civilian life and accepted a job at a local hospital where I eventually 

found myself working on a postpartum ward. Not what I had pictured 

myself doing in nursing school (like cardiac ICU), but I believe God 

has guided me to my current position caring for new moms and babies.

I love it. Giving support to the new mom who isn't sure she has what it

takes to be a mom is so rewarding. 

I am so blessed, loving my job and where God has guided me. I am 

thankful for all the experiences I've had, leading me up to this point,

and forming into the person I am today. Our road in life isn't always 

easy, but when following God, it's always worthwhile. 

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own 

understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which 

path to take.  Proverbs 3: 5-6, NLT (New Living Translation)

   

My Life: A Prayer List being Answered, Part 2

I don't know if it is normal for a child to wonder about and pray for
her own children that will come to be some day, but as a small
person, I'd lie in bed, stare at the ceiling and dream of the life ahead
of me, of the lives for which I'd be responsible. When I was growing 
up, I had an ambitious goal of having six children some day. Once I 
was into my twenties, I thought four or five would be a good round 
number. Now, I find myself talking my husband into having just a third 
and not so secretly hoping that the next pregnancy (some day) might 
be twins so that I can sneak in the fourth. 


But as my mother has told me many times, God is the Lord of my family, 
and He knows who my children are supposed to be, when they are to 
come, and the number of them that there is to be. I now rest in that knowledge, 
God is in control. For now, my two munchkins have me pretty busy. Not only 
are they in busy phases of their lives (at 3&1/2 and 20 months), but they are also
very busy children. 


Avalon Rose is my 3 and a half year old girl. One must forget about the "half"
part of her age. She is extremely intelligent (not that I'm biased or anything)
and has been debating with me since she was two. Never one to blindly obey,
she must understand why you want her to do a certain thing and feels the need
to be in agreement with you before she does it. When she does something 
wrong, it's hard for her to admit what she's done was wrong. Instead, she 
spouts out a logical explanation of why she had to do what she had to do and 
why I, the parent, am wrong. Her capability of deduction and reason has been 
astounding since she was a toddler. If all this wasn't enough of a challenge, 
she has started the sassy talkback. I didn't think I'd have to deal with that until 
she was at least eight. I know that these personality traits in her will be a huge 
advantage when she is older. She'll stand up for herself, be a strong woman 
of God, uncompromising in her beliefs and morals. This is what I'm praying for. 

                           
Beyond her strong will, she has a charismatic personality and a creative 
imagination. I wrote in a past post that she is the one who blamed a void
of earwax on a q-tip on a mysterious monster who had "licked it out" of her
ear already. She has "pretend friends" who occasionally grace our house 
as Backyardigan characters. Once she told me at the dinner table that her
pretend friend Pablo needed some food too. I told her that since he was
a pretend friend, he could eat pretend food. This seemed perfectly logical
to her and didn't initiate her effective debating skills. Avalon also has
super human hearing. You can be having a hushed conversation in the 
car while she is otherwise occupied in the back seat, only to have her
ask you later about an aspect of your conversation that had been hushed
for a reason. My husband and I have been burned this way more than
a few times. 


James David is my bulldozer toddler, completely unstoppable. When 
he sets his mind on doing something, watch out, because nothing will 
stand in his way. I remember looking into his eyes when he was six 
months old and just learning to crawl. There was a drive and determ-
ination visibly present in his gaze that startled me. How could such a 
young baby be so intense about accomplishing a goal? Since that day,
I have seen that determination help him do pull-ups and climb 
bookshelves at only eight months, kick a soccer ball within only
two days of learning to walk (the week before his first birthday),
and squirm out of his highchair straps and stand up on the seat 
at about 15 months. He is still in the phase of not knowing fear
or having a sense of danger. To say that he keeps me on my
toes, is an understatement. 

                       
Along with all his advanced gross motor skills, he also has a strong
vivacious personality with a strong will that rivals Avalon's. For months,
we battled for control at dinner time, just for control's sake. Thankfully,
he is finally cooperating more at our evening meal, but it was touch 
and go there for a while. He started having tantrums a few months 
ago as well and over the littlest things, like not being able to play 
with a ball in the play yard when picking his big sister up from 
preschool. So there I'd go holding to my side the child who was 
kicking his legs, whipping his arms around furiously, and shrieking
as though having a knife stuck in him somewhere, through the halls
with other mother's eyeing me as I passed. I hoped they were thinking
I'm so glad that my child isn't doing that today verses What has that 
woman done to her poor child. He still has an occasional tantrum,
but they have lessened in severity, duration, and frequency. Thank
you, God. My prayer for James is that God directs his energy and 
drive into what God has prepared for him. 


Both my children are affectionate, sympathetic, loving, kind hearted,
adventurous, curious, spirited, beautiful and full of endless energy.
I am so blessed to have them in my life and so thankful to God 
for entrusting me with their upbringing and care. God certainly 
answered my prayer in bringing these wondrous children to me, and 
and am certain He will answer my prayers in regards to their futures.


"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for 
welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." 
Jeremiah 29:11, ESV (English Standard Version)


"Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old 
he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6, ESV